#My500Words - Day 21 of 31 #YouGoodMan Pt. 2 "Depression: Don't Man Up, Rise Up"

Depression is a devious beast that is often regarded as a myth until you experience its wrath. It creeps up on you when you least expect. Like a sky filled with dark clouds it begins to dampen the mood around you. Depression is the feeling of helplessness.

It is when all things that you once had control over begin to crumble like the world is falling around you. It seems like all you can do in that moment is nothing. Cemented in your fears and overwhelmed with the anxiety of your deteriorating happiness.

We all face many challenges that we have to overcome. They force us out of our comfort zone, which enables our ability to truly grow. Many of those challenges have to do with overcoming our own internal obstacles. These are obstacles that obstruct your mental health and threaten your inner being and mindfulness.

They are never uniform and they definitely don’t give a warning before revealing themselves. It’s hard to overcome something in which there is no up front meaning or if it lies deep within and hidden within your own fears.

Few people will understand what’s going on in your mind when you don’t even know for yourself. Forget the saying you don’t know what someone has been through unless you walk a mile in their shoes. The real truth is that you don’t know what someone has been through unless you’ve taken a peek inside his or her mind. If you want to take a peep inside my mind please let me know what you find, because I’ve been unable to discover all that lies within.

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We all want to be happy as happiness is often described as the single meaning of life. Even so, when you are powerless over the control of your own happiness that is when you are at your weakest moments. It’s the worst feeling not knowing why you’re sad or why you are feeling emotions of depression.

It’s like a disease that you feel the effects from but the doctor is unable to diagnose. Only in this instance, you are the both the patient and doctor and where the only remedy seems like time.

But most of all, it’s the lack of control that is most frustrating. Being unable to control your own happiness can make a man cry on a lonely evening or morning. It’s hard to explain what it feels like to someone who has never lived through it.

It’s an overwhelming moody sensation that can last for one day, a few weeks, and maybe even a few months. You never get to control how long it stays for, or how hard it gets, and definitely not when and if it comes.

As I type these letters I’m not in the best of moods. But I’ve found writing to be a form of expression that helps me with my own mental health. An outlet where I get to self-diagnose myself with my own words, words that may have been hidden deep within but are able to expose themselves on the page.

When feeling depressed or down, all you can do is try to stay positive. But the reality is, sometimes life is hard. Sometimes life gives a big middle finger to your happiness and for no expected reason at all. It seems unfair for life to act in such a way.

What did you ever do besides try to be the best you that can be? But, yet such a journey or conquest of oneself often comes at the expense of your mental health. If life was easy and mental health was never a human issue, we would be living in a world of harmony and nirvana.

Don’t hide your emotions from yourself, as it does nothing to heal whatever may be causing your mental wounds. It may seem easy to never examine every deep corner of your internal being because we are often scared of what we may find. It’s easier to do the quick fix and just patch it up. To put on our game face when really it’s just a mask, hiding the face underneath, with its tear rolling down its cheek.

#YouGoodMan

However hard I try, I force myself not to cry as to fit society norms of masculinity. They often tell you to man up and get over it — the masculine standard to overcome any and all things. It’s ironic that often it’s the man who mans up whose true identity is most damaged by the things he tried to escape. Even if you man up, there is no hiding from the pain unless you face them. Don’t man up and instead, rise up.

We can’t fall victim to the outstretched arms of depression, anxiety, stress or whatever it is. Stand up strong, hit the gym, and get your mind right. All we can do, even in times when we’re at our lowest points is to show love, continue working, give thanks, and try not to trip.

Reformat the negative energy into something positive. Keep walking the road and you’ll always get to your destination. Tomorrow is another day to rise up and become the master of your own fate.