#My500Words: Day 23 of 31 "A Kanye Rant on Kanye"

Hello Mr. West,

My name is Jeremy and I'm one of your fans. As a kid who looked up to you when you dropped out of college, you became my favorite rapper. In an era of oversized t-shirts and baggy jeans, it was your polo style, soulful beats, and conscious lyrics that catapulted you to the top of my favorite artist list.

I followed you to late registration where you made crack music and even to graduation where I felt like a champion with every play. After graduation, you innovated the game with your synthesizers and autotune on 808's. Afterward, you ran away and made a beautiful dark twisted fantasy with a monster. 

You have always been a god in your own sense and named yourself Yeezus. I've taken your cue and even did the same and named myself Yermzus. Then you lived a life of Pablo and rode the wave to an ultralight beam. Each of your albums is unique not only in their sound but also in their composition. You are a revolutionary artist who was never afraid to push the boundaries. 

You taught us that we are gods and to love ourselves unconditionally. You taught us to never compromise and to always follow our passion. You inspired an entire generation to create their own unique style. You told us to never give up on our dreams and ideas. You were an inspiration to all the backpackers who were just looking for a circle to fit in.

Many people don't understand your state of mind but you just want everyone to love him or herself as much as you love yourself. You teach self-love and confidence, which is one of the main things that I have learned from you. 

When you dropped Yeezus, it seemed like an absurd statement to call yourself a god and you got lots of backlash for it. Truly, I didn't even understand until I was conscious to understand what you meant by it. We are all gods and have the ability to create our own realities and there are endless possibilities for creation. We are all gods that control our own destiny – everyone should have a bit of Yeezus in their mentality. 

I would ask people once I first met them how they felt about you as a way to gauge how they were mentally. To see if they understood your teachings, which is being self-confident in yourself and to be your own god. I wanted to see if they got it. Although, I don't even know how I feel about you anymore. I have always wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt but I'm starting to lose faith. 

But, yet, like all men you are just human who is plagued by his ego. You've always been a man of antics and self-expression but there is always a fine line for everything. Lately, I'm afraid that your ego has now outgrown you. It's too big for itself and it seems as if your ego has now become Kanye. 

I understand that you haven't been the same since your mom died and I can't even fathom losing mine. But then you got married to that gold digger which was kind of ironic. You know, since you made a song about gold diggers so I thought it was pretty hypocritical that you left your girl for a white girl. You became a Kardashian and now the Kardashian curse is prevalent in all things that you do. You see Kanye, not only did you marry a well-known gold digger but you've never been the same since. 

I think you have sold your soul to the devil and your ego has now outgrown yourself, you've lost control. From the constant rants at your shows, showing up late and leaving early, that's how you have paid your respect, back to your fans. The same fans who have stood by you through all your bullshit. You have the most loyal fans, most of which feel betrayed by the new Kanye. This isn't the Kanye that they grew to love.

But honestly, for me, the final straw was your support of Trump. Are you that ignorant that you can't relate anymore to the common man or fan? It's almost as if you now live in the Kardashian fantasy world. Come back down to earth Kanye and rid yourself of ego. Seek the help that you need because you don't seem well and healthy in a lot of ways. 

Kanye, you were once my favorite artist, starting at the age of 13 when I walked with Jesus. I guess it was my mistake for idolizing you in the first place but every kid needs someone to look up to. From now on, I'll be more careful and critical on the next artist who I admire. We all need a good humbling one day, I hope you'll get yours soon. 

I miss the old Kanye.